Have you ever asked yourself the question: “why am I alone?” Well, to answer that, I’ve listed 9 types who seem to always be alone. Are you one of them?
The One with the Fear of Rejection
You desperately want to date but the fear you might be rejected, paralyzes you. You imagine the woman laughing at you or telling the entire room that you tried to hit on her.
You have to realize 2 things:
You are going to get rejected. Everyone does at one point or another.
Getting rejected doesn’t say anything about you, your character or your value.
Don’t and throw in the towel after a rejection. You have to keep trying. Eventually you’ll meet that one girl that likes the way you look and the way you talk.
Now, if you try hitting on women a lot and you get rejected every time, then, maybe, it’s time to get some advice on what you’re doing wrong (from friends, family or experts) but don’t ever get discouraged.
The One who doesn’t Take Action
You sit behind the computer all day. You watch. You read. You learn. You look. You listen but you never take action.
You have your reasons, I’m sure (you’re insecure, inexperienced and afraid, you don’t like the way you look etc.) but they only perpetuate the situation.
Start taking action now. Hang out with friends and meet people in a bar, in the park. Walk up to women in the supermarket, in the bank, on the street and talk to them. Have casual conversations on random subjects, with no purpose but to get out there and experience.
The next step would be to ask someone on a date.
You’ll get there.
Take action. Talk to women. Your confidence will boost. You’ll get comfortable. Conversations will flow. Women will respond to you.
The One who is still Hung Up on His Ex:
(“Why can’t she be more like my ex?”)
Even though it’s natural to think about your ex and to sneak a peek at her Facebook profile, it’s a different story if you still do those things two years after the break up.
You idealize the relationship because you felt something really strong or because she rejected you, and you put all your efforts in trying to get back together with her.
Every new girl is there just to pass the time or gets compared to the ex. Every new relationship has no chance of succeeding.
And the sad thing is that you can wake up one day and realize you missed out on a chance to be with a wonderful girl just because you were too hung up on your ex to notice.
“She eats her peas one at a time.”
(Seinfeld. season 7 episode 1)
It could be a very good quality in other areas in life but when it comes to your love life it’s a big no no.
You look for the perfect woman and tend to break up relationships over insignificant things.
You never feel complete in a relationship and always have the feeling that there is something better out there for you.
You have very high demands from yourself and your girlfriend and zero tolerance for any behavior, appearance or expression that doesn’t meet your expectations.
You tend to, sometimes, ignore your girlfriend’s needs in favor of what you think is best but expect her to always be attentive and sensitive to your needs.
You need to realize that “You’re not perfect, sport. And let me save you the suspense. This girl you met, she isn’t perfect either. But the question is: whether or not you’re perfect for each other.” (Good Will Hunting)
If you have Narcissistic Personality Disorder you appear at first to be the best boyfriend ever. You act successful; people around you admire you, you make big romantic promises, and act jealous, which your significant other finds flattering.
After the cloud of infatuation clears, though, she discovers that the jealousy has become a major factor in the relationship and is followed by criticism her clothes and behavior, limitations on her social life, interrogations and lack of space.
The One who is too Nice
Are you familiar with the term nice guys finish last? Well in the dating world they don’t finish at all. It’s’ okay to be nice but only in moderation. If you’re like ‘you want your phone? Do you need me to dial for you? What else can I get for you? You’re too tired? I can carry you to the car.’ She will run! Play hard to get. Let her do stuff for you. Show her that you have other options.
The One with the Anxiety Issues
You’re not an easy guy to be with because you bring with you to the relationship all of your anxieties and tensions and create a reality where both of you always walk on eggshells. Every aspiration for change shifts your relationship out of balance. You have a hard time committing to a decision and the fear of rejection, the fear of making a catastrophic mistake makes it very hard to find and keep a partner. Because once you do find one, they bolt after they realize that the relationship is stuck with no chance of change in the foreseeable future.
The One with the Borderline Personality Disorder
When the relationship with your significant other goes well, you shower her with attention and adoration, but when it doesn’t hold up to your expectations, your self-confident is shattered and you manifest your hurt by hurting her verbally or physically, abusing her emotionally, and even by threatening to hurt her or yourself. You link your self-worth to the relationship and the fear of abandonment tends to try and keep her with you by saying things like “I’ll kill myself if you leave”.
The One with the Avoidance Issues
You could be very successful and still be alone because you have a pattern of avoidance which interferes with your ability to hit on women and have a relationship. Even when you do find a relationship, you still find it hard to reveal yourself, your emotions and thoughts and you end up pushing your girlfriend away.
I used to be the one who doesn’t take action. What type are you??